


we were

by teal_shadow



Category: Winner (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-08
Updated: 2020-04-08
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:55:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23545006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teal_shadow/pseuds/teal_shadow
Summary: Mino and Jinwoo were beautiful.
Relationships: Kim Jinwoo/Song Minho | Mino
Comments: 1
Kudos: 9





	we were

**Author's Note:**

> this story was the outcome of Jinwoo mentioning that We Were is one of his favorite songs.

It’s been a long time since he talked to Jinwoo. He knew that the elder needed space. It’s been almost a year. There were times when he found himself dialing a familiar number on his phone but it was a good thing Jihoon or Yoon would snatch it before he can proceed with drunk calling his ex. 

It’s not like he planned to say anything to hurt the other or himself. He just wanted to ask the standard. _How’ve you been? Are you healthy?,_ Jinwoo had the tendency to be locked up in his house if no one checked on him. Despite Seunghoon hyung’s reassurances that Jinwoo was fine and he had others who care about him, he still worried. When his hyung said that though, it stung a bit. Seunghoon hyung had no intentions of softening the blow or holding back for Mino’s or Jinwoo’s sakes.

_It’s been a while since we saw each other_ ,Mino would always find himself thinking whenever he happened to glance at the camera Jinwoo had bought him for his birthday. He doesn’t use it. He’s afraid his fingers would shake, and it’ll break just like what happened with them. He couldn’t control it. His anxiety and panic attacks got to the point that he hurt the one most precious to him without realizing. It was too late before he thought to mend the wounds he inflicted.

He was drinking alone in his apartment. Jhonny was fast asleep on her bed near his door. Dara noona’s drama was playing on his flatscreen TV but he paid it no mind. He didn’t think Jinwoo would answer after a few rings. He was already betting it would end up in voicemail like all the other times he attempted to call the only number he memorized aside from 119. The other end remained silent, and he didn’t end the call immediately so Mino thought it was a chance to talk.

 _I called you cuz I thought of you_ , he said trying his best to hide the tightness in his chest.

Actually, Mino’s thoughts were never vacated by Jinwoo. No matter how hard he tried, there is always a Jinwoo-shaped void that haunts him from within. It didn’t help that when Yoon finally convinced him to move to a new apartment, he stumbled upon it. More than the drunken confidence he was feeling, this was what prompted him to call his ex in the first place.

 _I found something yesterday,_ he began. Jinwoo hummed to tell him that he was listening.

 _A photo of us I thought I lost was stuck between my bed,_ he finally said. _Our bed,_ he corrected in his thoughts.

It was a photo of them taken in Japan. Jinwoo had a photoshoot with a model from their agency. Mino, on the other hand, just tagged along for leisure. It was during their first year of dating. They didn’t have much time on their hands so they just spent it by roaming the street where Don Quixote was. They took the picture near the river after the tourist boat passed by and with a view of the bridge. 

_We were smiling back then.We looked so happy_ _,_ were Mino’s thoughts as his eyes lingered on Jinwoo’s smile that made his eyes crinkle. Mino’s arm was around the elder’s waist in a motion that was anything but possessive. It was almost as if he was about to lift Jinwoo up off his feet.

Seeing that picture and others like it as well for the first time in a long time, was a sort of revelation to Mino. The days leading up to their end weren’t pretty. It involved numerous cuts that he knew had left both of them bleeding maybe until this very moment as they’re on the phone with each other. 

_Why is this important, Mino?,_ the elder replied to him after what seemed like hours. Mino chuckled bitterly. 

_Cuz in my memories till now, we were always in tears._ _We were both lonely and_ _in_ _the_ _shadows_ _of our shared secret,_ Mino’s mouth didn’t have a filter anymore.

He wanted to understand so badly why something as beautiful as what he had with Jinwoo would turn into something ugly. He can feel the tears streaming down his face now. Tears of frustration. He’s surprised he hasn’t rid himself of feeling this way. It’s been long enough.

 _Mino-yah,_ _we were beautiful when we first met_ _. But I’m sorry. I don’t know how many more times I’ll apologize to you. We’ve burned out, love_., Jinwoo replied.

Mino can hear him sniffling on the other end. He didn’t want an apology. Jinwoo never needed to apologize to him. It was him who should be grovelling. He was doing it now. He just wanted the elder to fall back to his arms once again. The tightness in his chest only grew worse.

 _But Jinwoo hyung_ , Mino couldn’t help but whine. He wasn’t going to let this call end until he got the closure they both needed. He knew this much. Jinwoo was openly crying now. Not hiding it anymore. 

_Even when we were fighting...Oh, back then we were beautiful._ , Mino smiled despite the tears flowing down his face. He was sober now. Sober enough that all the memories, bad and good, played behind his closed eyes. His right hand is still clutching his phone, the only bridge he had with Jinwoo right now.

 _When just looking at your face made me happy. When we cried because we didn’t wanna say goodbye._ _,_ Mino opened his eyes. He didn’t know if he was tired of reminiscing or crying. Maybe, it was both.

 _Back then, we were--,_ Mino couldn’t fight the sobs anymore. 

As Mino was trying to calm himself, Jinwoo voiced out his thoughts and decided that they needed this. It wasn't a weakness.

 _Behind the painful and difficult memories, there were more beautiful moments._ , he tried to comfort the younger. It wasn’t a lie but a fact he holds onto. He hopes Mino could look at their relationship the same way he does. It was beautiful yet fleeting.

 _It’s been a long time_ , Jinwoo continued. He let himself get lost in memories of them together as well.

 _I don’t know how long it’s been since I’ve talked this long on the phone with you._ , Jinwoo allowed himself a smile. Mino seemed to be calming down now and he hummed at the elder’s observation.

 _I think it was good that I took courage._ , Mino replied after he took a long exhale to end his short breakdown. Jinwoo hummed.

After a while, Jinwoo asked.

 _Do you need anything else, Mino?_ Jinwoo was afraid the younger would ask him to take him back again. Mino had always been persistent especially when he wanted something. He was too vulnerable now. They both were. They needed more time to mend themselves before they could choose to revisit what they had.

Mino seemed to hear the worries he had even without voicing it. The younger had a sixth sense when it came to Jinwoo after all.

 _Don’t feel pressured_ _though, Jinwoo hyung._ _I’m just reminiscing_ _about_ _our beautiful days_ _with you._ _I know it’s too late to turn us around_ _,_ Mino didn’t sound defeated anymore. He needed to reassure his hyung that his intentions weren’t going to hurt either of them anymore. He was done with that.

 _I know I hurt you the most, hyung. For that, I’ll always be sorry. I don’t deserve your forgiveness and I won’t go asking for it._ _But when I look back, You were_ _so_ _beautiful._ _Even with_ _your tears that were shed all night._ _Even_ _your puffed-up face_ _during our worst days,_ _you were beautiful. The day that became our last because of my mistake, you were beautiful._ _I promise, I won’t ask anything of you anymore. Not until I can become a person who is worthy of a second chance from someone as dazzling as you. I will be better, hyung. Not just for_ _you_ _, but more for myself. I want to be the person_ _you_ _can be proud of again. Until then, good bye. You were, are, and always will be my one and only muse,_ Mino's heart felt ten times lighter after his speech.

Jinwoo was the one to end the call. He didn’t take offense to the older man not giving him a reply. It was more than enough. Jinwoo still had the tendency to spoil him apparently for giving him three hours of this night or early morning to be exact.

He made it to his bed after taking a warm shower. His eyes were puffy but he paid it no mind. He took out the now framed photo from his bedside table’s drawer. The one of them in Japan.

As Mino fell into one of the most peaceful sleeps he’s had in a year, his last thought was, _we were beautiful_.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! comments are greatly appreciated~ let's all stream Remember tomorrow! I always hope that our Private Kim Jinwoo eats well, sleeps well, and serves his country well.


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